The day after the budget is usually the moment when things start to fall apart.
asserted
things → start → budget
When clued-up journalists and economists have had a chance to go through all the fine points the chancellor would rather everyone had missed.
asserted
everyone → clue → points
The forecasts that suggest everything is predicated on a wing and a prayer.
asserted
everything → suggest → wing
But on Thursday morning Andy Burnham and John Healey could afford themselves a sigh of relief.
uncertain
Burnham → afford → relief
All had gone about as well as they could have hoped.
uncertain
they → go → ?
It turns out that when you don’t make any massive tax or spending commitments, there isn’t a great deal to unravel.
asserted
you → turn → commitments
All there had been was a raft of small-scale interventions designed to help people with their personal finances.
asserted
All → design → finances
In fact, Healey and Lewis now seem unable to get through the day without spending some time with each other.
asserted
Healey → seem → other
They certainly can’t stop talking about one another.
asserted
They → stop → one
It’s becoming unhealthily co-dependent.
asserted
It → become → ?
It had been billed as the “breathing space” budget.
asserted
It → bill → space
Apocalypse averted.
asserted
Apocalypse → avert → ?
Difficult decisions delayed.
asserted
decisions → delay → ?
Hope that we all wake up in 52 weeks’ time and the world looks like a less frightening place.
asserted
world → wake → place
And even if it doesn’t, it will always have had a year’s grace.
asserted
it → do → grace
A chance for the Tories and Reform to implode.
asserted
Tories → implode → ?
You can always hope.
asserted
You → hope → ?
Come the traditional morning-after interview with the chancellor on the Today programme, the presenter Nick Robinson seemed uncharacteristically subdued.
asserted
presenter → seem → programme
Normally he’s a terrier on occasions like these.
asserted
he → ’ → these
There’s never been a budget that Nick wouldn’t have been able to do far better himself.
asserted
Nick → do → that
This one was something you might find on the consumer affairs programme, You and Yours.
uncertain
you → find → programme
And the BBC was in the process of axing that.
asserted
BBC → ax → that
So the 20 minutes passed with little fuss.
asserted
minutes → pass → fuss
Healey started with his usual infectious brand of pessimism.
asserted
Healey → start → pessimism
He was born to be the bearer of bad news.
asserted
He → bear → news
He wasn’t quite sure why anyone was still bothering with anything.
asserted
anyone → bother → anything
If it had been up to him he would have ended the interview before it had started.
asserted
it → end → interview
Other than that, given the chance, he wouldn’t have started from here.
asserted
he → give → chance
The world was screwed.
asserted
world → screw → ?
Britain was screwed.
asserted
Britain → screw → ?
Nick tried to find a reason to believe.
asserted
Nick → try → reason
Couldn’t the chancellor have made just a little more effort?
asserted
chancellor → make → effort
Having a plan to have a plan wasn’t the usual budget fare.
asserted
Having → have → plan
Healey, AKA Dr Death, shrugged.
asserted
Healey → shrug → ?
It was one up on having a plan to not have a plan.
asserted
It → have → plan
By now Robbo was audibly struggling.
asserted
Robbo → struggle → ?
How could he put it politely?
uncertain
he → put → it
This wasn’t exactly the big transformation that had been promised.
asserted
that → promise → ?
Could he even say if he would bring down the benefits bill?
uncertain
he → say → bill
“There will be a reduction in the benefits bill,” said Dr Death.
asserted
Death → say → bill
…and 32 more, not listed.
The Aporia
