A woman and I had a relationship that ended badly.
asserted
that → have → relationship
We met on the job, though we work in different departments.
asserted
we → meet → departments
Everyone knows about our previous relationship, and it is extremely awkward.
asserted
it → know → relationship
Every time I walk by, there are lots of smiles and chattering; when I approach my co-workers’ desks, I’m greeted with silence and intense stares.
asserted
I → walk → silence
I still have strong feelings for her, and I know they are reciprocated because she has verbalized it and shown it with her actions and behaviors.
asserted
she → have → actions
After she ended things, I was upset and gave her the silent treatment.
asserted
I → end → treatment
I know she feels hurt by my pretending like she doesn’t exist.
asserted
she → know → pretending
I am a stubborn man, but I really miss her.
asserted
I → miss → her
After the breakup, she mentioned being friends.
asserted
she → mention → breakup
Despite the amount of time that has gone by, I still want to fix things.
asserted
I → go → things
However, I know my real intentions and illusions about getting back together are misguided fantasy.
asserted
intentions → know → ?
I would appreciate your insights.
asserted
I → appreciate → insights
— AWKWARD AT WORK
DEAR AWKWARD: Do you understand that it’s you, not your co-workers, making things awkward?
asserted
things → understand → WORK
By resorting to the silent treatment, you’ve made everyone uncomfortable.
asserted
everyone → resort → treatment
You say you want to fix things, but you’ve made no attempt to do so.
asserted
you → say → attempt
You don’t believe you can reconcile with your ex, but on what grounds?
asserted
you → believe → grounds
You won’t even talk to her!
asserted
You → talk → her
I don’t think you’re “stubborn”; I think you’re afraid.
asserted
you → think → ?
You’ve kept up this unseemly behavior because you don’t want to be hurt again.
asserted
you → keep → behavior
If you can’t muster the courage to tell this woman you want another chance, you have two options left: Either speak with her purely as a colleague and bury the hatchet so you can at least be cordial in the workplace, or start looking for another job.
asserted
you → muster → job
My father’s girlfriend, “Jane,” has started soliciting money for her causes from everyone she knows, especially our family members.
asserted
she → start → everyone
After the first request, I donated a modest amount to support her, not knowing the deluge of requests that would follow.
asserted
that → donate → requests
I have a set amount of money I can use for charity and would rather decide for myself how to spend it.
asserted
I → have → it
Jane and my father are sensitive about her being accepted into our family.
asserted
her → accept → family
They both tend to look for slights and then blow them out of proportion.
asserted
They → tend → proportion
Dad has made it clear that unless my siblings and I fully embrace Jane, he won’t be part of our lives.
asserted
he → make → lives
I admire him sticking up for her, but I know if I decline the next donation request it’s going to get ugly.
asserted
it → admire → request
I feel like I’m being held hostage.
asserted
I → feel → ?
How do I get out of this situation?
asserted
I → get → situation
Talk to your father privately and tell him you love him.
asserted
you → talk → him
Remind him that you don’t have an unlimited amount of money to donate to charity, that you have causes of your own that are important to you, and that you have already donated to Jane’s more than once.
asserted
you → remind → Jane
Ask him to explain that to her and that it isn’t a rejection of her — just fiscal responsibility on your part.
asserted
it → ask → part
He needs to know you feel like you won’t be able to have a relationship with the father you adore if you refuse these solicitations.
asserted
you → need → solicitations
** ** **
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren.
asserted
Abby → write → Buren
For nearly four decades, Jeanne Phillips penned this column, which was founded in 1956 by her mother, Pauline Phillips.
asserted
which → pen → mother
The Aporia
