My husband, “Dirk,” cheated on me more than 20 years ago.
asserted
husband → cheat → me
He has kept in touch with the woman since then.
asserted
He → keep → woman
Sixteen months ago, she told him she was “in a bad place.”
asserted
she → tell → place
He offered to let this (married) woman move in with us and didn’t tell me until two weeks before she got here.
asserted
she → offer → weeks
Abby, this woman lives like a pig.
asserted
woman → live → pig
Her room is filthy, and she has broken several things in my house without paying for anything.
asserted
she → break → anything
Before she moved here, Dirk wanted to get her teeth fixed.
asserted
teeth → move → ?
I ended up paying for it with my credit card.
asserted
I → end → card
She promised she was going to pay me back, but she has given me exactly $510 of the $5,000 that she owes me.
asserted
she → promise → me
She has a job, so there’s no reason why she is not giving me the money.
asserted
she → have → money
I’m not worried about Dirk cheating with her again, as she has not maintained her looks or figure over the years.
asserted
she → ’m → years
Still, how much more of this should I take?
asserted
I → take → this
I asked her to leave once, but he got her to come back.
asserted
her → ask → her
He will not go to marriage counseling as he doesn’t think we need it.
asserted
we → go → it
When I ask him why he keeps her around, he tells me he enjoys her company.
asserted
he → ask → company
Do you think I should contact a lawyer and start divorce proceedings or let this go?
asserted
this → think → proceedings
— LOSING MY MIND IN TEXAS
DEAR LOSING MY MIND:
asserted
DEAR → lose → MIND
My dear, you should have left long ago.
asserted
you → leave → ?
However, since this woman is not a physical threat, resist the urge to move out until you have your attorney’s approval.
asserted
you → resist → approval
Abandoning your home may harm your case in the divorce proceedings.
uncertain
Abandoning → abandon → proceedings
I became close with an attractive, younger co-worker last year.
asserted
I → become → worker
Realizing I was starting to get a crush, I told her I needed to stay away because of my feelings and, being married, couldn’t risk losing my family.
asserted
I → realize → family
She went through a hard time during our breakup, but we started getting close again.
asserted
we → go → breakup
The breakup led her to do something she regrets so much it has affected her work.
asserted
it → lead → work
It has alienated pretty much everyone she knows except for me.
asserted
she → alienate → me
I have encouraged her to seek professional help because her emotional state is very draining.
asserted
state → encourage → help
I also feel I have reached a point where I no longer want to be around it, but I don’t know how to tell her without feeling guilty for turning my back on her when she’s begging for help.
asserted
she → feel → help
She’s in such a depression; she’s killing herself slowly.
asserted
she → ’ → herself
What should I do?
asserted
I → do → What
What you should do is reiterate to her firmly, but as kindly as you can, that she needs to get professional help for her depression.
asserted
she → reiterate → depression
If she balks, explain that, because of her emotional state, she has alienated friends and co-workers and that you are not equipped to give her the support she needs.
asserted
she → balk → support
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren.
asserted
Abby → write → Buren
For nearly four decades, Jeanne Phillips penned this column, which was founded in 1956 by her mother, Pauline Phillips.
asserted
which → pen → mother
The Aporia
