In partnership with TENA Men, Donnovan Bennett invites us to reimagine invincibility.
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Bennett → invite → invincibility
Male incontinence affects one in three men over 40.
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incontinence → affect → 40
Of the 20 million men in North America experiencing urinary drips and dribbles, fewer than 11 per cent use purpose-made products, and only two per cent discuss it with their doctors or peers.
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cent → experience → doctors
In this piece, Donnovan Bennett calls for men to be proactive about their bodies, vulnerable with their peers, and honest about aging.
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men → call → aging
I recently realized that parts of my middle-aged male existence are in conflict.
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parts → realize → conflict
Modern men can incorrectly believe we’re not aging if we don’t acknowledge it.
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we → believe → it
We want to still be invincible.
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We → want → ?
But at the same time men aren’t socialized to talk about health - even in 2026.
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men → socialize → 2026
So, let’s start talking about it.
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’s → let → it
People say you are the average of your five closest friends.
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you → say → friends
In my case, I’d say that number is closer to 15.
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number → say → 15
I’m blessed to have a vast array of solid male friends that motivate me, and I’ve learned over time that mentorship is often horizontal — peer-to-peer rather than top-down.
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mentorship → ’m → peer
Case in point, my health and some of the difficult or uncomfortable conversations that are made easier with friends.
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that → make → friends
But how do you chat (not joke) with your buddies about hair loss?
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you → chat → loss
Sometimes it seems impossible.
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it → seem → ?
A couple years ago, a buddy was reading literature about the correlation between VO2 Max and longevity.
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buddy → read → Max
For those unfamiliar, VO2 max is the maximum amount of oxygen your body can use during exercise and is one of the key tests for prospects at the NHL draft combine.
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body → use → combine
More importantly, for the rest of us, it has become a strong predictor of long-term cardiovascular health.
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it → become → health
The discussion inspired us to check our VO2 max numbers and compare them to the publicly recorded numbers of pro athletes, because we felt like being humbled.
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we → inspire → athletes
(And make no mistake, we were.)
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we → make → mistake
We also decided to set up a challenge amongst the group and track our workouts and VO2 maxes over the course of a year to see who improves their score by the greatest margin.
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who → decide → margin
The unintended benefit of our challenge was that it gave us indicators for checking up on our friends.
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it → give → friends
If someone hadn’t worked out for a while, it was a signal to reach out.
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it → work → while
What started out as a project geared towards physical well-being transformed into something that encompassed mental health and overall well-being too.
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that → start → health
It showed me that peer pressure without judgement is connectedness.
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pressure → show → judgement
Being in a group that addresses health, both physical and mental, is a blessing that I don’t take for granted because it’s rare.
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it → address → that
Most men love team sports, but we have yet to realize that doing life well is one of them.
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doing → love → them
Even in 2026 — for most health concerns — men just don’t talk about it, especially more taboo topics.
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men → talk → it
There are many examples, but let’s use incontinence as a baseline.
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’s → be → baseline
There are 20 million men in North America who experience drips and dribbles — not an insignificant number.
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who → be → drips
However, only 11 per cent use purpose-made products to help and only two per cent open up about their experience with doctors or other men.
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cent → use → doctors
The stats show that even if it’s not you — someone in your circle might be dealing with incontinence.
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someone → show → incontinence
Chances are whoever that is hasn’t spoken up because they have yet to acknowledge their condition.
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they → speak → condition
In fact, it often takes around 15 years on average for a man to accept the condition.
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man → take → condition
If I juxtapose that with my wife’s group chats and algorithms, there’s a stark difference.
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I → juxtapose → chats
There’s an emerging community encouraging women to have conversations about health concerns that are underrepresented and stigmatized — and there is a lot to learn from that.
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that → ’ → that
I’ve yet to have my algorithm show me content about drips and dribbles, male pattern baldness, or back pain.
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algorithm → have → drips
But the issue isn’t platforms — it’s people.
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it → ’ → ?
We aren’t fed that content because we haven’t shown that we want it.
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we → feed → it
If we’re afraid to discuss these issues, we’re definitely not going to readily press like on a post about them.
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we → ’re → them
…and 27 more, not listed.
The Aporia
