Spider-Man: Brand New Day (now on VOD platforms like Prime Video) delivered the same old thing: massive piles of cash.
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Man → deliver → cash
No surprise then, that it amassed $2.5 billion at the box office — note: that’s a whole lotta money — enlivening the Marvel Cinematic Universe and building anticipation for the release of Avengers: Doomsday during the upcoming Christmas corridor.
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that → amass → corridor
And that means it comes close to forgetting it’s a Spider-Man movie as it threatens to become a Punisher-Hulk-“New Avengers”-[REDACTED]-and-sometimes-Spider-Man movie.
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it → mean → ?
So does our all-time fave superhero survive another bloated MCU melee?
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superhero → survive → melee
Let’s find out.
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’s → find → ?
Peter Parker-slash-Spider-Man (Tom Holland) put every feeling ever into this letter.
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Man → put → letter
This letter, to his old girlfriend MJ (Zendaya), who, like everyone else in the world, had their brain zapped by Dr. Strange so they’d forget Spidey’s secret identity (see: Spider-Man: No Way Home) — which admittedly was a good way to overcome the overarching problem of several Spider-Man movies, namely, that too many people know his secret identity.
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people → have → identity
And so we’re subject to a sad/triumphant montage of what Peter/Spidey has been up to for the last few years: becoming “the pride of New York City” by taking out crime lords in concert with police commish Jean DeWolff (Liza Colon-Zayas), and feeding a serious case of the lonelies by obsessively scrolling social media feeds of MJ and his old best pal Ned (Jacob Batalon).
Spidey’s antag this time around is an entity that can jump in and out of people’s brains, save for Spidey’s.
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that → ’re → Spidey
It’s far easier for him to web up jamokes like Scorpion (Michael Mando) than to pin down a far less corporeal villain.
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him → ’ → villain
So the plot gins up lotsa help for him: He meets with Yelena Belova, the new Black Widow (Florence Pugh), who heads the New Avengers (see: Thunderbolts).
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who → meet → Thunderbolts
He consults with the Dept. of Damage Control, a gov’t agency that manages and cleans up after superhero kerfuffles.
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that → consult → kerfuffles
He uneasily pals up with loose-cannon vigilante the Punisher (Jon Bernthal).
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He → pal → vigilante
He consults with Bruce Banner/the Hulk (Mark Ruffalo) since Spidey’s powers are evolving and he needs some new tech to keep them under control.
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he → consult → control
He frets over MJ, who inevitably ends up in danger even though Peter’s whole intent with the memory-eraser thing was to prevent that.
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intent → fret → that
Well, they’re [REDACTED] for a good reason, and that reason has so very much to do with the future of the MCU.
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reason → ’re → MCU
What Movies Will It Remind You Of?
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It → remind → You
And if we’re comparing, No Way Home edges out Brand New Day as the best of the Holland Spidey flicks.
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Home → compare → flicks
The film at the very least gives real-life couple Holland and Zendaya several scenes to stretch themselves emotionally within these characters — which keeps the movie afloat.
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which → give → movie
Just a little sexual tension when Spidey, wearing only boxer briefs and his mask (yeah, sure, you can LOL)
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you → wear → briefs
Fortunately, director Destin Daniel Cretton managed to cram all this stuff into a mere 145 minutes.
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Cretton → manage → minutes
I kid — Brand New Day is consistently enjoyable despite being so unwieldy.
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Day → kid → ?
We’re left with the notion that of the three primary plots — Peter’s depression, his changing powers, facing the mind-hopping villain — the latter is expendable.
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latter → leave → villain
But it also brings the external conflict MCU movies need, in the form of action sequences, existential threats and connections to past and future MCU movies.
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movies → bring → movies
And you know what the second rule is.
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rule → know → ?
Setting aside that Marvel ain’t gonna alter that M.O., there’s enough substance to Peter and MJ’s characters — proper justice is done to both, and scenes between Holland and Zendaya are the strong heart of the movie — to sustain Brand New Day amidst the clutter.
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scenes → set → clutter
Cretton proved to be an inspired action director with Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings, and that means this is the most visually kinetic Spidey film since Sam Raimi’s efforts.
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this → prove → efforts
And Holland, Zendaya, Bernthal, and Pugh give memorable, layered performances, be they emotionally resonant (the former two) or to deliver comedy beats (the latter two).
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two → give → beats
Frankly, the much-anticipated introduction of [REDACTED] into the MCU feels wholly unnecessary to this movie, but wholly necessary for the jump to Doomsday — which means Brand New Day doesn’t work at the same that that it does work.
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it → anticipate → same
If late-stage Marvel isn’t twisting us into pretzels like this, then it’s not being late-stage Marvel, is it?
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it → twist → this
Our Call: Brand New Day is another good-bordering-on-very-good Spider-Man movie, but we haven’t had a great one in a while now.
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we → border → while
STREAM IT, lest ye be lost on the way to Doomsday.
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ye → stream → Doomsday
Werner Herzog hugged him once.
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Herzog → hug → him
The Aporia
