A date in Ben Meer’s early 20s turned into an assessment of everything he was doing wrong.
asserted
he → turn → everything
“You dress in baggy clothes,” his date, a Dutch woman, told him.
asserted
date → dress → him
“You eat too fast.
asserted
You → eat → ?
You walk without grace.
asserted
You → walk → grace
You don’t speak a second language.
asserted
You → speak → language
You can’t cook …”
asserted
You → cook → ?
Her list of his shortcomings “was longer than a CVS receipt,” Meer recounts in his new book, “How to Be Good at Life” (Avery, out now).
asserted
Meer → recount → Life
The criticism stung because he knew she had a point.
asserted
she → sting → point
He didn’t have it together in myriad ways.
asserted
He → have → ways
He was running a failing skin-care business from a 350-square-foot apartment and carried $32,000 in credit-card debt.
asserted
He → run → debt
He paid the rent by waiting tables on weekends, working 14-hour shifts.
asserted
He → pay → shifts
Eventually, he closed the company and included a sample kit with his application to Cornell’s business school, which accepted him.
asserted
which → close → him
A class in business operations gave him a different way to think about his problems.
asserted
class → give → problems
His startup, he realized, had no reliable way to bring in sales or handle customer complaints.
asserted
he → realize → complaints
He applied that same thinking to his own life, setting up systems to manage his life using savvy and behavioral science — not sheer will power — to meet deadlines, get in workouts, stick to a budget and the like.
asserted
He → apply → budget
“We hear things like ‘trust the process,’ but I spent years trusting the process when I didn’t actually have a process,” he said.
asserted
he → hear → process
Meer, now 34, has made a career of teaching that worldview.
asserted
Meer → make → worldview
He has roughly 2.25 million followers across his social media accounts.
asserted
He → have → accounts
Another 252,000 active subscribers receive his free newsletter, System Sunday, which offers practical ways to make smarter choices and avoid distractions.
asserted
which → receive → distractions
Meer charges his phone in the living room, so he sleeps better and doesn’t waste endless hours scrolling.
asserted
he → charge → hours
To watch less TV, he removes the batteries from the remote control so that he has to get up off the couch to put on a second episode.
asserted
he → watch → episode
Meer didn’t intend to become a productivity guru.
asserted
Meer → intend → ?
After earning his MBA, he joined Ernst & Young as a consultant in 2019 and was assigned to write an internal newsletter.
asserted
he → earn → newsletter
He was going through a breakup and threw himself into the writing.
asserted
He → go → writing
His manager suggested he become a writer, advice that took a while to appreciate.
uncertain
that → suggest → while
“I was actually a little bitter about it because I’d just spent $150,000 on an MBA and wanted to be thought of as this great strategist,” he told The Post.
asserted
he → spend → Post
He returned to writing during the pandemic, launching a blog about using systems to improve everyday life in February 2022, and things took off from there.
asserted
things → return → February
His company now rakes in seven figures, with coaching clients who pay tens of thousands of collars for his expertise.
asserted
who → rake → expertise
Meer won’t reveal the names of his clients, but he told The Post he helped a creative director get home in time to put his kids to bed.
asserted
director → reveal → bed
He also described working with a senior product leader at a major tech company who started an advisory practice and eventually quit her job to run it full-time.
asserted
who → describe → it
Meer and his fiancée, Jade Bonacolta, also run Archimedes, a 12-week program for building a following on LinkedIn.
asserted
Meer → run → LinkedIn
It has a listed price of $3,299.
asserted
It → have → 3,299
Bonacolta, a former Google marketing leader who also writes about self-improvement, brings an audience of her own.
asserted
who → write → own
Her advertising page lists 482,000 LinkedIn followers and 312,000 subscribers to her newsletter, The Quiet Rich.
asserted
page → list → newsletter
He and Bonacolta hold a monthly “Life Dinner,” an idea the book credits to venture capitalist Brad Feld.
asserted
book → hold → Feld
Over supper, they discuss their relationship and what each needs from the other, which sounds like a performance review with appetizers.
asserted
which → discuss → appetizers
At one of their first Life Dinners, Bonacolta told him he’d seemed tired and distracted during a meal with her colleagues.
asserted
he → tell → colleagues
He figured he could be better company next time if he took a nap first.
uncertain
he → figure → nap
Years ago, as he was helping clients make better use of their time, Meer spent two hours every morning trying to set himself up for success.
asserted
Meer → help → success
His routine included brushing his teeth on one leg and dunking his face in ice water.
asserted
routine → include → water
…and 7 more, not listed.
The Aporia
