In 1981, as Iran’s new government hunted down political opponents, a KGB officer slipped into a bathroom in the British Embassy compound in Tehran.
asserted
officer → hunt → Tehran
Vladimir Kuzichkin, 6-foot-4 and broad-shouldered, sat on a wicker laundry basket that creaked beneath him.
asserted
that → sit → him
Across from him, MI6 officer Ian McCredie sat on the toilet.
asserted
McCredie → sit → toilet
McCredie poured the Russian another vodka.
asserted
McCredie → pour → vodka
He left the faucets running and turned on a radio to drown out their conversation.
asserted
He → leave → conversation
If the Revolutionary Guards overheard them, “they would both be arrested, interrogated, imprisoned, and possibly executed, once the torture was completed,” writes British journalist Ben Macintyre in his new book, “Redwood: The Untold Story of the Cold War’s Most Extraordinary Spy” (Crown), out now.
uncertain
Macintyre → overhear → Spy
Kuzichkin had come with Soviet secrets.
asserted
Kuzichkin → come → secrets
He also had a very personal and bizarre question for McCredie, though he was in no hurry to ask it.
asserted
he → have → it
A KGB major who handled contacts with Iran’s Soviet-aligned Tudeh Party, Kuzichkin described weapons caches, communist agents inside the Iranian military and a possible coup that might bring Soviet troops across the border.
uncertain
that → handle → border
“The coup might happen tomorrow, next month, or never,” Macintyre writes.
uncertain
Macintyre → happen → ?
Kuzichkin knew about the preparations because “he was the linchpin of the conspiracy.”
asserted
he → know → conspiracy
To prove himself, Kuzichkin brought a Soviet Embassy directory and identified the spies hidden among its officials.
asserted
Kuzichkin → prove → officials
“An hour and a half had passed with Kuzichkin barely pausing for breath,” Macintyre writes.
asserted
Macintyre → pass → breath
“Gallons of water had swirled down the drains.”
asserted
Gallons → swirl → drains
Kuzichkin took another drink, leaned forward and placed a hand on McCredie’s knee.
asserted
Kuzichkin → take → knee
“I have big problem,” he said.
asserted
he → have → problem
“Will you help me?”
asserted
you → help → me
“I have no power in bedroom,” Kuzichkin explained.
asserted
Kuzichkin → have → bedroom
He believed Western medicine could cure his impotence.
uncertain
medicine → believe → impotence
“Nothing in McCredie’s life or MI6 training had prepared him for the challenge of handling a spy with erectile dysfunction,” Macintyre writes.
asserted
Macintyre → prepare → dysfunction
McCredie promised to help, and Kuzichkin “almost crushed him in ‘a tremendous bear hug.’”
asserted
Kuzichkin → promise → hug
At their next meeting, McCredie gave him a letter from MI6’s chief medical officer, wrapped around the ink cartridge inside a ballpoint pen, and a bottle of red pills.
asserted
McCredie → give → pills
Kuzichkin read the letter and swallowed two pills.
asserted
Kuzichkin → read → pills
They were vitamins with iron, which MI6 hoped might work as a placebo.
uncertain
MI6 → hop → placebo
McCredie also handed over a camera for photographing KGB documents.
asserted
McCredie → hand → documents
Instead of a James Bond gadget, the technical branch had supplied “an elderly miniature Minox,” Macintyre writes.
asserted
Macintyre → supply → Minox
Kuzichkin snorted.
asserted
Kuzichkin → snort → ?
“We have these in the museum!”
asserted
We → have → museum
In one week, he photographed 180 documents inside the Soviet Embassy.
asserted
he → photograph → Embassy
The British named him REDWOOD because of his height.
asserted
British → name → height
Macintyre notes that nobody initially noticed the name’s other possible meanings: “‘RED’ (communist) and ‘WOOD’ (slang for an erection).”
asserted
nobody → note → erection
By spring 1982, the strain was showing.
asserted
strain → show → spring
McCredie concluded that Kuzichkin had told his wife about MI6 and panicked when she refused to defect with him.
asserted
she → conclude → him
He demanded an immediate escape.
asserted
He → demand → escape
Kuzichkin had one more request.
asserted
Kuzichkin → have → request
He wanted to be circumcised as soon as he reached Britain, certain it would solve his erectile dysfunction.
asserted
it → want → dysfunction
MI6 had heard some odd asks from Soviet defectors over the years, but this was a new one.
asserted
this → hear → years
“Kuzichkin was the first spy in history to demand, as the price of defection, the removal of his foreskin,” Macintyre writes.
asserted
Macintyre → demand → foreskin
MI6 delivered on that promise, arranging for an army doctor to circumcise him at a military hospital in Aldershot in July 1982.
asserted
doctor → deliver → July
The UK intelligence agency also forged a British passport for one “Michael Guy Road,” a supposed diplomatic courier.
asserted
agency → forge → Road
…and 28 more, not listed.
The Aporia
